Girlfriend: And are you sure you love me and no one else?
Boyfriend: Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday
Waiter: Would you like your coffee black?
Customer: What other colors do you have?
Manager: Sorry, but i can't give u a job. I don't need much help.
Job Applicant: That's all right. In fact I'm just the right person in
this case. You
see, I won't be of much help anyway!!
Dad: Son, what do u want for ur birthday?
Son: Not much dad, Just a radio with a sports car around it.
Diner: I can't eat such a rotten chicken. Call the manager!
Waiter: It's no use. He won't eat it either.
Diner: You'll drive me to my grave!
Waiter: Well, you don't expect to walk there, do you?
Husband: U know, wife, our son got his brain from me.
Wife: I think he did, I've still got mine with me!
Man: Officer! There's a bomb in my garden!
Officer: Don't worry. If no one claims it within three days, you can
keep it.
Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you
anything!
Son: That's why I say she's no good!
Thursday, November 09, 2006
Monday, March 20, 2006
Bill Gates- After Death
Well, Bill," said God, "I'm really confused on this one. I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell! After all, you helped society enormously by putting a computer in almost every home in the world and yet you created that ghastly Windows. I'm going to do something I've never done before. I'm going to let you decide where you want to go!"
Mr. Gates replied, "Well, thanks, Lord. What's the difference between the two?"
God said, "You can take a peek at both places briefly if it will help you decide. Shall we look at Hell first?" "Sure!" said Bill. "Let's go!"
Bill was amazed! He saw a clean, white sandy beach with clear waters. There were thousands of beautiful women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about.
The sun was shining and the temperature was just perfect!
Bill said, "This is great! If this is Hell, I can't wait to see Heaven!"
To which God replied, "Let's go!" and off they went. Bill saw puffy white clouds in a beautiful blue sky with angels drifting about playing harps and singing.
It was nice, but surely not as enticing as Hell. Mr. Gates thought for only a brief moment and rendered his decision.
"God, I do believe I would like to go to Hell."
"As you desire," said God.
Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the late billionaire to see how things were going. He found Bill shackled to a wall, screaming among the hot flames in a dark cave. He was being burned and tortured by demons.
"How ya doin', Bill?" asked God. Bill responded with anguish and despair.
"This is awful! This is not what I expected at all! What happened to the beach and the beautiful women playing in the water?"
"Oh, THAT!" said God. "That was the screen saver"
Mr. Gates replied, "Well, thanks, Lord. What's the difference between the two?"
God said, "You can take a peek at both places briefly if it will help you decide. Shall we look at Hell first?" "Sure!" said Bill. "Let's go!"
Bill was amazed! He saw a clean, white sandy beach with clear waters. There were thousands of beautiful women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about.
The sun was shining and the temperature was just perfect!
Bill said, "This is great! If this is Hell, I can't wait to see Heaven!"
To which God replied, "Let's go!" and off they went. Bill saw puffy white clouds in a beautiful blue sky with angels drifting about playing harps and singing.
It was nice, but surely not as enticing as Hell. Mr. Gates thought for only a brief moment and rendered his decision.
"God, I do believe I would like to go to Hell."
"As you desire," said God.
Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the late billionaire to see how things were going. He found Bill shackled to a wall, screaming among the hot flames in a dark cave. He was being burned and tortured by demons.
"How ya doin', Bill?" asked God. Bill responded with anguish and despair.
"This is awful! This is not what I expected at all! What happened to the beach and the beautiful women playing in the water?"
"Oh, THAT!" said God. "That was the screen saver"
Thursday, March 09, 2006
To keep u smiling :)
This happened in JeddahAirport
One Indian passenger named Anantharaman Subbaraman arrived at Jeddah airport.
He ended up waiting for his visa for about 2 hrs for the authorities to call his name...
Finally, he got fedup and went to them and asked why they haven't called his name yet. They said that they have been calling him for the last hour and a half ......... were wondering why he hadn't responded!
The reason was made clear when the immigration officer pronounced his name as: 'Anotherman Superman'
One Indian passenger named Anantharaman Subbaraman arrived at Jeddah airport.
He ended up waiting for his visa for about 2 hrs for the authorities to call his name...
Finally, he got fedup and went to them and asked why they haven't called his name yet. They said that they have been calling him for the last hour and a half ......... were wondering why he hadn't responded!
The reason was made clear when the immigration officer pronounced his name as: 'Anotherman Superman'
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
After a long time...Posting an Entry
Before reading this please dont think of the person you love
A true, touching love story that happened in the Jammu & Kashmir (border) areas.
The headman of a big tribe had a beautiful daughter, who fell in love with a boy
who was an ordinary poor person.
When the people of the tribe came to know about their love, they did not like it at all, and so began to protest about it. Now it happened that the two lovers left their homes for a happy future.
The people of the tribe started searching for the two lovers but they could not find them. At last,they accepted their love and asked them in a newspaper to come back.The people said that if u both come back we will let marry u, we accept
that u loved each other truly.
So in this way their love won and the age old attitude of the tribe took a
beating.
The couple went to the city for shopping for the wedding. He was wearing a white traditional dress, and was crossing the road when a car came and hit him
and he died on the spot.
The girl lost her senses. After a long time she recovered and accepted that her love has died.
One night she was sleeping in her home with her family. Her mother had dream in which she saw a fairy. That fairy asked her mother to wash the blood spots of the guy from her daughter's clothes as soon as possible. But her mother ignored the dream.
Next night the father saw the same dream, he also ignored it. Then when the girl had the same dream the next night, she woke up and told her mother about the dream.
Her mother asked her to wash the clothes on which there were blood spots. She washed the spots but some remained. Next night she again had the same dream she again washed the spots but some still remained. Next night she again had the same dream
and this time that fairy gave her last warning to wash the blood spots, else something terrible will happen.
This time the girl tried her best to wash the spots, the clothes tore, but some
spots still remained.
In the evening on same day, when she was alone, someone knocked the door,
when she opened the door she saw the fairy at the door. She got very scared and fainted.
The fairy woke her up...,
and gave her an object, That awe-struck girl asked "what is this..?
to which the fairy replied : -
...."kaise bhi daag ho,
jaise bhi daag ho........
Surf Excel hai na..."
------------------------------------------------------
A true, touching love story that happened in the Jammu & Kashmir (border) areas.
The headman of a big tribe had a beautiful daughter, who fell in love with a boy
who was an ordinary poor person.
When the people of the tribe came to know about their love, they did not like it at all, and so began to protest about it. Now it happened that the two lovers left their homes for a happy future.
The people of the tribe started searching for the two lovers but they could not find them. At last,they accepted their love and asked them in a newspaper to come back.The people said that if u both come back we will let marry u, we accept
that u loved each other truly.
So in this way their love won and the age old attitude of the tribe took a
beating.
The couple went to the city for shopping for the wedding. He was wearing a white traditional dress, and was crossing the road when a car came and hit him
and he died on the spot.
The girl lost her senses. After a long time she recovered and accepted that her love has died.
One night she was sleeping in her home with her family. Her mother had dream in which she saw a fairy. That fairy asked her mother to wash the blood spots of the guy from her daughter's clothes as soon as possible. But her mother ignored the dream.
Next night the father saw the same dream, he also ignored it. Then when the girl had the same dream the next night, she woke up and told her mother about the dream.
Her mother asked her to wash the clothes on which there were blood spots. She washed the spots but some remained. Next night she again had the same dream she again washed the spots but some still remained. Next night she again had the same dream
and this time that fairy gave her last warning to wash the blood spots, else something terrible will happen.
This time the girl tried her best to wash the spots, the clothes tore, but some
spots still remained.
In the evening on same day, when she was alone, someone knocked the door,
when she opened the door she saw the fairy at the door. She got very scared and fainted.
The fairy woke her up...,
and gave her an object, That awe-struck girl asked "what is this..?
to which the fairy replied : -
...."kaise bhi daag ho,
jaise bhi daag ho........
Surf Excel hai na..."
------------------------------------------------------
Tuesday, October 04, 2005
IndianIdiots
This is one of the funniest phonecalls I have ever heard....
Click on "IndianIdiots" and Enjoy the PhoneCalls :-) :-) :-) :-)
Click on "IndianIdiots" and Enjoy the PhoneCalls :-) :-) :-) :-)
Monday, October 03, 2005
Allow ur Boss to talk first
A junior manager, a senior manager and their boss are on their way to
a meeting.
On their way through a park, they come across a wonder lamp.
They rub the lamp and a ghost appears.
The ghost says, "Normally, one is granted three wishes but as you are
three,
I will allow one wish each"
So the eager senior manager shouted, I want the first wish.
I want to be in the Bahamas, on a fast boat and have no worries.
"Pfufffff, and he was gone.
Now the junior manager could not keep quiet and shouted
"I want to be in Florida with beautiful girls, plenty of food and
cocktails.
"Pfufffff, and he was also gone.
The boss calmly said, "I want these two idiots back in the office
after lunch ".
MORAL OF THE STORY:_
Always allow the boss to speak first
a meeting.
On their way through a park, they come across a wonder lamp.
They rub the lamp and a ghost appears.
The ghost says, "Normally, one is granted three wishes but as you are
three,
I will allow one wish each"
So the eager senior manager shouted, I want the first wish.
I want to be in the Bahamas, on a fast boat and have no worries.
"Pfufffff, and he was gone.
Now the junior manager could not keep quiet and shouted
"I want to be in Florida with beautiful girls, plenty of food and
cocktails.
"Pfufffff, and he was also gone.
The boss calmly said, "I want these two idiots back in the office
after lunch ".
MORAL OF THE STORY:_
Always allow the boss to speak first
Thursday, September 29, 2005
Men are better friends!!!!
Women:
A wife was not at home for a whole night. So, the very next morning, she tells her husband that she stayed at her girlfriend's apartment over night. The husband calls 10 of her best girlfriends, and none of them confirms that.
Men:
A husband was not at home for a whole night. So he tells his wife the very next morning, that he stayed at his friend's apartment over night. So the wife calls 10 of his best friends : 5 of them confirm that he stayed at their apartments that night, and the other 5 are claiming that he is still there with them !
Conclusion of the story:
Men are better friends!!!!
A wife was not at home for a whole night. So, the very next morning, she tells her husband that she stayed at her girlfriend's apartment over night. The husband calls 10 of her best girlfriends, and none of them confirms that.
Men:
A husband was not at home for a whole night. So he tells his wife the very next morning, that he stayed at his friend's apartment over night. So the wife calls 10 of his best friends : 5 of them confirm that he stayed at their apartments that night, and the other 5 are claiming that he is still there with them !
Conclusion of the story:
Men are better friends!!!!
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